...

It hurts to see us being like this. I've never been devastated as much as this in my whole entire life.I can't do anything about it. I think about you day and night tryna figure out what's going on. You wanted me to leave you alone and im trying to but its too hard. I dont want you to be just another face in my life. I dont need and want anyone else. I could honestly say you're the best gf I've ever had. I know I'm not the best for you but I could try to change to make things work out. I know you're sick and tired of me and that's fine. I just wonder if you still think about me, care about us, love me and if we're even gonna get back together. Only time could tell. All I could do is wait. I might be waiting for nothing but its worth the risk.At least I tried. I'll do whatever it takes to have u back in my life. I hope you still love me. I know I've made alot of mistakes but hey I'm trying to learn from it. I didnt know what you wanted because you never told me what you want. I admit that I've abused you emotionally. I was too selfish and ignorant about everything. I'll change my ways just for you. For once, I'm actually scared to lose someone. I was too controlling and too much of an asshole. Sorry for everything. Sorry for the way I treated you. I know none of these matters but I just wanted to let you know how I feel. Sorry for never putting you as my priority. I've always put you aside and now that you're gone, I realize how special you are to me. I realize how painful it is to be like this. I realized that my life wont be the same. You were the only girl I cried over with. I was so unfair in this relationship and I admit it. I should have never locked you down. Sorry if I was too insecure and too much of a jealous man. I should have never abused your love. I should have treated you better. Now no matter what I do or what I say, nothing will ever matter to you because I know that you really dont care. I've cared so much that I didn't even see that it starts to hurt you or piss you off. I am over protective and I know that. I should have watched over my actions so that we didn't had to end up like this. I should have showed that I truely care instead of just bitching at you for stupid and dumb shit. I've made alot of mistakes. Hopefully you give me one last chance. Til then I'll be waiting..

Thinking of what we had and putting it into waste hurts me alot. I knew I should have spent more time with you instead of complaining about you visiting me. If I could go back in time, I'll change everything that I did so we didnt had to end up like this. I guess regrets are always really in the end.

I'll love you always and forever.